Health tips for better life

How to Win Friends & Influence People, by Dale Carnegie cites a great example of an employee: a genius in one capacity of his job, but a complete failure as the head of a department. They did not want to offend him as he was indispensable to the company. So, rather than try to improve his performance as a department head, they gave him a new title. One that allowed him to do the work he was extremely good at, while making someone else head of the department. They allowed him to save face.

Try to put yourself in any situation. How would you like to be treated if it were you with the problem? Try to consider the feelings of other people, and try not to hurt their pride.

A misstep in the handling of these situations can have devastating consequences. In a matter of minutes, it can destroy working relationships beyond repair. This is not something you want to happen in your Direct Sales Marketing and dealing with your team.

This is one of the many reasons why a reprimand of someone’s performance should be done in private. When done in public, the person in question may be evasive about questions of performance, in an effort to save face. There is no need to try to save face if the discipline is done away from others, in private.

Praise, on the other hand, should be done in the open, in public. This helps to build confidence, and allows people to be proud of their accomplishments.

It doesn’t matter if you’re right and the other person is definitely wrong, you only destroy ego by causing someone to lose face.

Nancy E. Collins

About two years ago I entered a slump in my day trading. I decided to hunt the internet, and there I found many day trading chat rooms. One by one I signed up for trials to see what they were about. I had never been in a chat room before.

After being in a few rooms, my impression was that the members of the room were looking for a leader, a guru, someone with the answers. I guess I was too, although I already had about thirty years of trading behind me. I’d like to think is was just more curious than actually looking for answers. Most of the room members seemed very naive. I’m sure they thought they’d be given an indicator or method that would allow them to start making money right away. The other thing I noticed right away was the ego of the moderators. They spoke with great authority, and suggested that their way of trading was the one and only way. Only they had the answer. And the room attendees, in each of the rooms, seemed to agree.

I did not see much new in any of these rooms. Each one had some kind of gimmick or special oscillator. Some had a black box approach, where you were supposed to just sit there waiting for the moderator to call out the trades. I did not see many winning trades from the little time I spent in any of these rooms. From what I saw, I doubted if any of these people ever made a dime trading. I kept moving on.

Eventually I came upon a chat room that was free. Free was interesting. How could it be free? They must be selling something. I logged on.

I heard the voice of a very calm, relaxed man that had just taken a huge win out of one of the stock index futures. Dozens of traders posted congratulations to the moderator for the winning trade, but more so for such a wonderful, magic indicator, and all the wonderful trading patterns from this magic indicator.

The magic indicator being used was actually introduced around 1980, but this moderator had some interesting improvements on the way it was displayed and the patterns it produced. And the room was not only free; there was a charity involved. He asked everyone to donate a little out of his or her winnings. How could anyone criticize anything that was done for charity?

The moderator made the claim that he invented the use of applying patterns to an indicator. He did rename all the patterns, but I recognized many of the patterns that were well documented in many old books. He just put strange names on existing patterns. The mostly new traders did not know these were old patterns. Nobody questioned anything in this room.

Despite nothing new here, it seemed he did an excellent job of categorizing many different patterns and putting them all together into a package that would be more readily accessible to new traders. So that was good. And there were many good concepts offered on trading in general, and money management. Also, the chat room was upbeat and positive. Most of the previous chat rooms I attended were negative and angry. I thought I should continue on.

I spent the next few months learning as much as I could. As much as I wanted to believe he had wisdom worth listening to and a viable approach, many things started really bothering me. One was his insistence that his indicator could lead price An indicator, which is a derivative of price, cannot lead the price. That’s just mathematically impossible. Another was his insistence that you cannot be watching prices while you are trading. What?! You cannot see what you are trading? If you were driving a car would you cover up the windshield? The people in this room would if he told them to.

I had a hard time believing that nearly a thousand people would accept everything that was being said. Accepting it so readily. Were they all drinking Kool-Aid? It was an interesting study on the need to believe in a leader, a guru. Someone that can help make dreams come true.

But I persevered. His trading results certainly looked more encouraging than mine did. I would get the recaps after market close on days that they were available. Nearly every trade in the recap was profitable. I tried to write down the trades as they were being called, and then tried to reconcile them in the recap after the market closed. But I began to notice in the recap that the winning trades were selected very carefully out of the real time comments. Again, nobody questioned any of this. Was I the only one who noticed the discrepancies?

At this point I decided to do my own testing. I had been in the room long enough to know every pattern and every nuance. I was good at programming and had the data to test. I took each pattern individually so I could find which patterns had profitable or encouraging tendencies. For my tests I decided I needed thousands of samples. I decided to test each of the patterns on five years of data, and broke them up into one year segments. I was just looking for profitable tendencies and robustness.

After programming everything, I tested the signals by hand; just to make sure my programming caught all the signals based on the rules, and did not create signals that should not have been there.

After spending weeks and reams of paper for my printouts, I found that none of the patterns resulted in a profit in any of the previous five years when tested mechanically. A pattern that was touted as winning 90% of the time, actually lost money, and in most years had less than 30% winning trades. Results on the rest of the patterns were less reliable than the flip of a coin, far less in most cases.

To summarize my testing: nothing worked. Nothing came close to a favorable tendency.
I tried to tell other people in the room about my research and the dismal results. Most of them would not hear it. They did not want to hear the truth. They were too invested in the method, and they had to believe they would eventually become successful if only they would hang on a bit longer, learn that secret that is just around the corner. But most of these people stayed in the room, some had been in for years, and kept showering congratulations onto the moderator for the great trades, and great magic, leading indicator. Did they ever look at their account statements?

You might assume my time spend in this room a waste of time. That maybe I thought that this guru did have the answer to trading success. I knew better than to expect this. The sad part is that so many other people don’t know better. They are told something that they want desperately to believe, and they believe it. They don not test it. They do not question it. They believe blindly. They invest much time and money, and then they get past the point where they simply want to believe. Now they are too invested and they have to believe. They will disregard all common sense and all facts and proof in an effort to keep the dream alive. I certainly learned about psychology and the mind of chat room traders that I compete with every day.

Trading is hard work, and every trader has to find what fits his or her own personality and temperament. Nobody is going to easily give it away, whether in a free chat room, or a paid room or seminar, or a so-called trading school. There’s a whole industry out there that supply traders with tools and education. Very little of it is good. Most of it is a waste, taught and promoted by people who are not successful using the approach themselves.

There is no doubt that chatting up girls can be nerve racking. Many of us do not even bother to act due to an overwhelming fear of rejection. With that said I posit one question to you. Are you going to spend your life thinking or doing? There is only one way to find out if a girl likes you or not and that is by asking her out. Even if you get all the signals you still have to ask her out. If she says no then you will not spend your days saying,”What if”

Nobody including myself likes to be rejected and hence feel unattractive. This of course dissipates your sense of self worth and hence confidence. As a result of which we drop our heads and make excuses.

With that said there are techniques you can employ to reduce the impact of being rejected or furthermore side step rejection all together. Our ego’s can be frail even for those who seem the most confident. As a consequence you need to be more strategic in your approach as opposed to being tactical.

Tactics engage one method whereas strategy tends to lean more towards the bigger picture. When you are strategic your chances of success are greater over the long term. In a strategic sense your goal is to make friends and you will also understand that being that we are all different means that we all have different types, and if she says no, there are many reasons as to why she may have done so.

If you are not her type then that does not mean that you are unattractive and don’t think either that those types of women are going to reject you for the rest of time.

Just like investing do not put all your eggs in one basket as this leads to imbalance. There are plenty of wonderful women out there you just have to find the right one and that ought to be your mission and you can start by making friends.

One powerful technique is to ask open ended questions that have general interest, besides politics, religion or sex. Another powerful technique is to listen and let her do most of the talking, you would be amazed at what you can learn when you listen.

To conclude never approach a girl from behind, do not get personal and do not jump right on the compliment bandwagon as it can come of as insincere right out of the gate. Get chatting first then say you enjoyed her company and ask if she would like to continue the conversation another time. Bottom line put your self in her shoes and be observant of what is taking place.

Lately scientists who research the material world are discovering that the picture of the world is completely subjective and is wholly determined by the qualities of the observer. As Niels Bohr famously asserted, the researcher does not study the surrounding world, but his reactions to it. If this is so, then the natural sciences can be characterized as knowledge one attains by means of the five senses he received from birth. In contrast, the field studied by the science of Kabbalah lies above the range of the regular five senses’ perception. In this sense Kabbalah is a unique science. One attains it by developing an additional inner “sensor,” or a new sense. This happens by changing the vector of one’s egoism.

In order to understand this notion, let us first refer to the dictionary: Egoism (from the Latin ego-”I”)-a point of view, a position, or a person’s behavior that are entirely oriented at his “I,” at his benefit (pleasure, profit, success, happiness).

In Kabbalah egoism has no negative connotation. It is understood as a desire that a person receives from nature. According to this, egoistic attainment of the surrounding reality is considered natural, and altruistic attainment-supernatural.

One should keep in mind that our senses (vision, hearing, smell, taste, and touch) are not egoistic. They are only sensing devices that pick up an incoming stimulus, bearing no relation to any desire. After the stimulus or influence is received, it is passed into the desire, becomes summarized, processed, and after that the egoistic desire perceives something and is filled.

So why do we call these five sensors the five senses, rather than five mechanical sensing devices? It is because the organs of vision, hearing, smell, taste and touch are enacted only by a person’s inner desire: the ear will hear and the eye will see only if the person desires this. They cannot function on their own. For example, when a person desires to sleep, his eyes may be open but he may be seeing nothing; if a sound bothers a person, his egoism will turn this sensation off and he will stop perceiving it. We call these five organs “the five senses” because they are enacted by one’s inner desire. However, these five senses can also be enacted by an inner altruistic desire, rather than the egoistic one.

When a person acquires a sixth sense, this indicates a change of the program by which he receives external information or the program by which he fills his desire. The desire remains the same as before, but the person changes his inner program: from reception inside oneself to using one’s desire for the sake of bestowal. Kabbalah calls this “the quality of bestowal” or replacement of egoism with altruism. This means a change of the method by which one uses his desire. In this case all of one’s feelings work in a different way, and a person changes his attitude to the world.

Research and observation of the upper structure have been done for centuries and confirmed by thousands of researchers, Kabbalists. This became the basis for the science about the Upper World or the manifestation of the Upper Force relative us. The difference between Kabbalistic scientists and non-Kabbalistic scientists is that Kabbalists research the universe by means of an additional sense. This sense can be acquired by anyone who wishes it.

This method is the same for everyone, and its realization depends on one’s desire. Every person can acquire this additional sense, that is, anyone can begin feeling the Upper Force and interacting with it. Moreover, Kabbalists ascertain that man was created only for this sake, that all our circumstances and history are pushing us only toward this. This is the only goal everyone must reach.

Let us examine the specifics of the scientific approach and method of Kabbalah.

The basics of the new approach

“Science” means researching the world around us, being able to record the results of the research, being able to repeat it, pass it on to others, and replicate the research by means of the natural five senses and devices that expand the range of these senses’ receptivity. Kabbalists assert that the Kabbalistic method allows one to acquire a new, sixth sense, called a “screen” or “soul.” This sense works analogously to the five natural senses: they are influenced by certain stimuli, they summarize and process these influences, and this gives one the picture of the world.

For example, when the ear drum is influenced by specific frequencies, they evoke oscillations in the ear drum, and this is what the ear perceives. In order to expand the range of the ear’s perception one can use a device that will perceive frequencies that the ear does not naturally perceive. This device will create oscillations of a frequency analogous to the oscillations taking place outside, and then transform them to frequencies that the ear can react to. The ear will reproduce them, understand them and absorb them.

The additional, sixth sense works by the same principle. It receives specific influences and perceives them according to its qualities and sensitivity. This gives us the picture we call “the spiritual world.” We record these sensations, analyze them, summarize them and bring them together into a single whole, called “the science of Kabbalah.” Like research of the natural sciences, these spiritual observations have been conducted for centuries and confirmed by thousands of Kabbalistic researchers. Their research of the Upper World is comparable to research of our world by regular scientists. Kabbalists operate with thoughts and desires as the objects of research, just as physicists and chemists operate in our world with their objects of research.

Those who cannot yet imagine that it is possible to be in a world of forces, thoughts, and desires may raise doubts: is Kabbalah really a science? Should one relate it to the category of the natural sciences such as physics, chemistry, and biology, which research the nature of the surrounding world; or to the humanities-philosophy, psychology, and so on? Kabbalah is a unique science because unlike other fields of classical science its registering devices are not outside, but inside a person. Additionally, Kabbalah does not demand knowledge from the researcher, but a special quality-the quality of congruence with the Upper Force of nature. This is its only requirement: the observer must begin changing himself to become like the object he observes. Other sciences are also reaching a similar conclusion: that the results of research depend on the researcher, his level, and his attitude to the world.